Does your story sound like this:
"I can’t feel their heart"
"We’ve lost our passion or connection"
"We no longer trust each other"
"There must be something more"
There is more
There is a way to go deeper in your relationship
even after many years of partnership
There is a way to create passion
There is a way to move past old stories and heal old hurts
There is a way
You were simply never taught what to do to keep a relationship vibrant and alive.
You were never taught how to let go of your shame for having needs and desires.
You were never taught that it was ok to want something more than a best friend.
whether on their own or with their partner, often work with me on:
Boundary Creating and Celebrating
Trust Building and Rebuilding
Nervous System Regulating
Limiting Belief Breaking
Drawing from over 30 years of working with individuals and couples
as they navigated the ups and downs of their lives
(and stumbling through plenty of my own ups and downs as well)
my approach blends modern theories of coaching and relationship science
with an alchemy of mysticism, tantra and mussar
placing a special emphasis on
embodied practices, breathwork and conscious conversations
In our sessions together, expect to
activate your nervous system
work through your triggers
be lovingly and sharply held
Private coaching sessions are held by phone, on Zoom and in person
Our private sessions allow for the ultimate in depth and intimacy
During our time together,
we will explore old stories and habitual responses
that may be keeping you from growing in your relationships
in your profession
and in your sense of self
We will rebuild trust that may have been broken
and not just do things to appear trustable
but retrain your nervous system to become trustable
We will sharpen your integrity
We will meet your shadows and taboos in a healthy way
that will benefit you and your partner
in your current or next relationship.
We will activate sexual energies that we naturally embody
but were taught to ignore
And we will practice new patterns of communication
that will change the way you connect with others.
Leslie and I do this praise practice every day and it continues to deepen our relationship.
Me: I praise Leslie for how she shows up, who she is being, or what she does, though I try to broaden it so it’s not a thank you for something she’s done for me.
Leslie: She lets my words settle in to not just hear them but to also feel them land in her body. She might respond with a thank you or it might lead to a whole beautiful conversation.
Me: “What else can I praise you for?”
Leslie: This is sometimes super hard to voice if we aren’t feeling praiseworthy at the moment. If she cannot come up with anything, I simply wait until she does.
Leslie: “I’d like you to praise me for…”
Ted: I then respond using her words and adding my own embellishment to show that I not only heard her request, but I also see that place that is worthy of praise.
I spent most of my life believing I was "too sensitive."
Because...that's what I was repeatedly told at home.
And so...I hid my sensitivity,
I created a shell around my emotions,
I even quietly (or perhaps not so quietly) judged others for showing their emotions.
Those who couldn't keep their shit together were lesser than!
It took me until very recently to realize that "You are too ___" is purely subjective.
There's no barometer of what is too sensitive or too serious or too much.
There's only sensitive
and there's serious
and there's me.
What it really means when someone says "You are too ____ "
is that "You are too ____ for their nervous system."
It's not about YOU being too anything.
It's about THEM not being able to handle your anything.
And that, my friends, is NOT your problem.
Sure, you and I can be conscious of our surroundings and the folks in them,
but carrying this idea that you're too _anything_
is not the way I want to go through life.
Let them work on them.
Dare to be too ____ !
The premise is that conflict is based in each of us coming forward with our unprocessed childhood or epigenetic wounds.
If approached consciously, conflict can eventually lead to resolution.
And, resolution of conflict between two people can create a sacred union.
And, all of the above requires difficult gut-wrenching conversations (read: “fights”).
Do wounds lead to conflict? Yes
Can conflict lead to resolution? Yes
Can resolution lead to a beautiful relationship? Yes
Must all of this be difficult? NO!
Sacred, spiritual, empowering, loving, beautiful relationships can also be created with EASE.
Ways to Work Together
"There aren't many people who I let guide me in life. There are not many people who I feel particularly comfortable leaning into trust with…
Ted brings so much depth and wisdom and curiosity, and just so many different modalities to be able to support someone like me. In the work that we did together, I have transformationally shifted my relationship with myself. It impacts the whole way I see the world.”
Santa Rosa, CA
“Ted has the powerful ability to guide one into confronting their shadows, encouraging reflection, awareness, and life-changing growth.”
" I really enjoyed working with Ted. The thing I appreciated most about Ted was that he held a strong line for me and didn't let me off the hook, even when I wanted to let myself off the hook. He has an incredibly welcoming and patient energy and provided space for me to think for myself and connect to myself in deep ways. He helped coach me through an extremely difficult season of my life and I'll be forever grateful."
San Francisco Bay, CA
"Ted introduced me to a diverse range of tools and frameworks that helped me more deeply explore and understand myself. I came to Ted feeling stuck in life, and within a few months he was instrumental in catalyzing change both personally and professionally."